My Carnival Ride

It’s not just about the TAG price xD

It’s not just about receiving, it’s about giving. And wow! U are the first person who shared that same principle with me. Again, it’s not about the TAG price. It’s about the thought. I’m so proud of you! xD I can’t thank you enough. It’s your birthday; but then, you made me feel as if it’s my birthday. Gawd. Ur the best pal ever!

Today is an epic day for many reasons. I rushed everything. It almost became a huge fiasco thanks to the incompetent employees of Haagen Dazs. I waited for more than an hour just to get that cake. Damn you people! I gave them my most evil stare which made them shiver. With their ever shaking voice, they tried to explain everything to me. Not an excuse!!!! but when the free scoop of ice cream did the talking, everything made perfect sense! xD hihi! I guess it was all worth it. = )

Jeepney here, jeepney there. EPIC! All eyes were on me. DUH! I was carrying a humongous card and a cake with a frozen box courtesy of dry ice! xD Plus, the ” tag factor”. hihihihi! xD Anyway, I gotta end it here. My mind’s not in the mood. Still can’t get over my Haagen Dazs escapades which is going on for several days now. XD

♪ Here I Am ♪

Everybody needs somebody who
They can pour their heart and soul into
Well if you need a place where you can run
If you need a shoulder to cry on
I’ll always be your friend

Becoming Everybody’s Fool

I’m going to eat my words. I seriously hope that I’ll eat these ones too. But sadly, life doesn’t work that way. It favors everything that is against you. When you aspire to achieve something, all the world conspires to drag you down. I’m a veteran. I should know.

Tomorrow’s the start of 2nd semester. Promises. I made tons of them. But as early as now, I know I won’t be able to live up to them. Not even one….. Sorry everyone. I know I have the capacity but not the will. What is one without the other? When emo-ness strikes, all efforts would be put to waste. Why effort at all?

People are fools. They believe that I carry loads of self-confidence. Yet I am the bigger fool. I did not want to admit that I had none. Self-esteem is a gift that I have yet to receive. All I do is pretend. And believe me, there are no flaws when you’re pretending.However, even the perfect mask is destined to crumble in due time revealing a weak and dependent human being.And as I write this blog, I begin to ask myself, how weak and how dependent am I? Desperate- even.

It is only now that I have discovered this side of me. The weak side. Perhaps a strong side did not really exist. Rather, a shell that was used to hide the inner self which cries for help. 

I have less than 24 hours to fix myself. I was never good at mending torn clothes. What makes you think I can mend a torn soul? Right now, I just want to run away from everything. Or maybe I just want to sleep? I’m not really sure. Maybe a bit of both. But I have lived this lie for too long. And it is best to embrace my vulnerable side. Admitting one’s weakness is in itself a great strength. 

The reason? I have yet to know. I have yet to find out. Even I, am oblivious of the reason. That’s why I don’t speak of any. 

Watch your thoughts; they become words.

Watch your words; they become actions.

Watch your actions; they become habits.

Watch your habits; they become character.

Watch your character; it becomes your destiny.